The ‘Ted Lasso’ guide to being a better person
I know I’m late to the party. “Ted Lasso” only ever came to my radar after I saw clips of it in my YouTube Shorts algorithm. Still, I only thought of it as a feel-good football show. It was perfect for the post-World Cup depression—and that was good enough for me to begin watching.
The show follows Ted Lasso, a college-level American football coach who is suddenly hired as the manager of a struggling Premier League team, AFC Richmond. While fans and critics remain doubtful of Ted and his capabilities for leading a professional football team—and rightfully so—he proves that his knack for creating team culture is second to none.
If I had to describe it, it’s like a best friend that will rip off the band-aid and be straight with you, and make you laugh to make up for making you feel bad. The show also does well with throwing in a few life lessons every now and then, and here are some I took to heart.
Be a goldfish
For his first coaching lesson, Ted refers to the goldfish as the happiest animal because of their 10-second memory.
In a football game, players make all sorts of mistakes that can lead to failed attacks, lost possessions, and conceded goals. The point? Until the whistle blows, you can’t let those little mistakes weigh on your mind and affect how the rest of your game is going to go.
Be a goldfish, keep your head up, and let go of your mistakes.
Be curious, not judgmental
As an inexperienced football coach, Ted has been subject to endless scrutiny from everyone he came across—at least at the start of the show. His players, bosses, and the very city his team plays for didn’t believe in him.
The key to his seemingly boundless optimism? He understands that the criticism he encountered is not indicative of his ability or potential. Rather, it is a reflection of the people it is coming from—that they choose to judge him and decide for themselves that he isn’t good enough, before he actually had a chance to prove otherwise.
“Ted Lasso” also applies this to how we approach people who may be facing personal battles outside work. It’s not necessarily about reaching out and trying to know what exactly they’re going through. Sometimes the best thing to do is stand back and understand that we don’t always know what’s going on in each other’s lives.
Find strength in your second chances
“I hope that either all of us or none of us are judged by the actions of our weakest moments, but rather by the strength we show when and if we’re ever given a second chance.”
That’s it. That’s the quote, and Jason Sudeikis delivers this wonderfully.
Give grace to those who wrong you
Of course it wouldn’t be much of a show if “Ted Lasso” is only just about football—rather, it delves into Ted’s personal life: his divorce, his relationship with his son, and his unresolved childhood issues.
Toward the end of its third season, when his mom visits him in London, he is visibly uncomfortable and reminded of their shared past. Mae Green, the owner of the pub Ted frequented, offers him a piece of wisdom by reciting “This Be The Verse” by English poet Philip Larkin:
“They f*ck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were f*cked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.”
It’s simple, really. Our parents aren’t perfect. They too had to deal with their own bullsh*t from their parents, and are simply trying to do better for us. Still, rather than holding on to resentment, we can instead thank them for their efforts, while also admitting their faults.
The past is past, but don’t forget about the present and those beside you
Dealing with the aftermath of his divorce, Ted—despite understanding that it isn’t the best thing to do—finds himself bothered by who his ex-wife, Michelle, is canoodling with.
It reaches an unhealthy level when he hires a private investigator to keep tabs on Michelle’s trip to Paris, when he’s supposed to be spending time with his son. AFC Richmond owner and friend Rebecca Welton snaps him out of it by telling him that while his time with Michelle has passed, his time with his son hasn’t.
Like Ted, many of our mistakes and past experiences weigh heavily on our minds and hearts. And while it’s important to confront them and come to terms with them, it shouldn’t come at the expense of those who are still with us.
Timeless for a reason
“Ted Lasso” first premiered in 2020 during the pandemic, at a time when everyone sorely needed something to smile about. This show was that singular ray of sunshine in a dark patch of our recent history.
Six years later, I don’t have the backdrop of a worldwide pandemic to highlight the positivity “Ted Lasso” brings. Still, it’s all about what it means to be human—to go through life despite its highs and lows, and the beauty of doing so together with those around us.
That much is timeless.
