How Rita Avila coped with grief through books
Actress Rita Avila wrote her first book, “8 Ways to Comfort with Grace,” in 2006 as a guide to consoling people who have lost a loved one.
This was after she lost her 3-week-old son, Elia Jesu. “When the tragedy happened, I realized that I share the same sentiments with people who experienced death in the family. So, I thought, ‘Why don’t I write a book on it?’
“The first thing I did was to research whether we already have an existing book on the topic. I found one but from an American perspective. Iba rin naman ang pang-Pinoy,” the actress told Lifestyle.
Avila said the book received lots of feedback from readers, mostly thanking her for her effort. Some said the eight rules in her book are very useful.
“One priest even commented that it’s not just for people dealing with death, but also for those who are taking care of sick family members,” said Avila in a recent media gathering to promote her latest film, Joel Lamangan’s “Huwag Mo Akong Iwan,” which is now screening in cinemas nationwide.
Avila went on to write nine more books for children, four of which were part of her “The Invisible Wings” series. “Writing them was an exciting part of my life. This ‘chapter’ didn’t end there. I went on to make short stories that were uploaded on my Rita Avila page,” she said.
Favorite books
During our interview, she brought with her copies of “The Invisible Wings 4: Be a Neighborhood SuperHero,” and “Ang Kwento Nina Popi Puti at Mimim Makutim.” She also showed Lifestyle copies of her favorite books and those that she is currently reading.
Avila said Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey’s “What Happened to You?” is an interesting read because it attempts to help you understand why you are the way you are at present by looking back at your past. “During the time you were still in your mother’s womb, and then when you’re just a baby; and how these experiences affected you while growing up,” she explained.
She then grouped this book with Ken Mogi’s “The Little Book of Ikigai” (“This is a gift from [TV host] Boy Abunda”) and Toshikazu Kawaguchi’s “Before the Coffee Gets Cold,” which she got from film director Adolfo Alix Jr. “It’s about cats—I love cats! I also like it because there’s a horror feel to it,” she said of the Kawaguchi novel.
She then brought out “Didache: Daily Bible Reflections for Catholics,” which she said reminds her of what she should reflect on for the day.
Another batch are by authors whose books she is trying to collect. Haruki Murakami (“Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman”) has a unique writing style, she said. “I find it challenging that I would have to read and reread him to fully understand what he wants to say.”
Her decision to read and, eventually, collect books by Osho (“Intuition: Knowing Beyond Logic”) “almost” brought Avila to India, where there are several meditation centers based on his teachings. “I imagine it being a beautiful spiritual experience. It’s still part of my future plans,” she said.
Another favorite is Deepak Chopra, author of inspirational books; and Gabriel Garcia Marquez, whom Avila considers one of the best romantic writers ever. “Mainipin ako sa novels, but not when I’m reading his,” she explained.
Avila said she fell “in love” with Paulo Coelho, author of the global hit “The Alchemist,” because his books “awakens one’s thoughts about himself.”
Nicholas Sparks (“Safe Haven”) is a winner when it comes to love stories and drama, Avila observed. “Magaling siyang magpaiyak. He has the ability to touch people through his stories, that’s why most of them get turned into romantic films,” she explained.
The stories of Mitch Albom also brings Avila to tears. “‘Tuesdays With Morrie’ makes me cry no matter how many times I read it,” she declared.
Exercise for the brain
Avila said she had wanted to bring her copies of Alex Lacson’s “Five Hundred Years Without Love” and “12 Little Things Every Filipino Can Do to Help our Country” but her bag was getting too heavy. She said Lacson’s first book is important because “poor Filipinos should know why they are being kept poor.” The second, however, is an “essential read for all,” she added.
Avila wants to encourage more people to read. “Reading exercises the brain. I read somewhere that, because a lot of them live an enclosed life, nuns are egged on to read books to enhance their memory, to improve their well being,” she stressed. “Also, reading transports you to places you’ve never been to before. This is why a lot of people who watch movie adaptations say, ‘I find the book so much better.’ The journey is a lot more memorable if you’ve read the story first.”
Avila also said nothing compares to the enjoyment of holding an actual book, turning its pages, and inhaling its distinct scent.
