Being resolute about resolutions
Many of us may have grown tired of or cynical about having New Year’s resolutions. I, for one, have stopped making them a long time ago. However, I feel that we should not give up on making these annual rituals just yet, as these commitments could actually make our lives better. There are ways of making New Year’s resolutions to be more than just promises that are doomed to fail.
A general principle to follow when creating a New Year’s resolution is to set ourselves up for success. Many of these resolutions fail because they are too grand and too unattainable from the get-go. Therefore, it may probably help if we make them simpler and more achievable. A way to approach this problem is to think of these resolutions, not as a major overhaul of our entire being, but as simple changes in some of our behaviors that make up our entire being. So instead of resolving to have “great health” this year (from living a highly sedentary lifestyle), try resolving to at least have 5,000 steps every day, and to have at least seven hours of sleep every night. Resolutions that are stated in more specific terms also have higher chances of being achieved versus those that are too generally and vaguely stated.
How we state the resolution matters. State a resolution that prescribes what to do instead of what not to do. For example, instead of just saying, “I resolve to not drink soda anymore this year,” try stating it as “I resolve to drink more water this year.” The first statement only prescribes what not to do, but it does not offer an alternative (and who knows, the alternative to not drinking soda might be worse). However, the latter statement prescribes what to do, which may automatically displace soda drinking, thereby reducing the occurrence of the latter behavior in the process.
The success of sticking with our New Year’s resolutions also heavily lies within our capacity to control the situation in which these resolutions are to be implemented. Therefore, create resolutions that you can control. For instance, it will probably be futile to resolve to have “healthier workplace culture,” because culture is something that people cocreate, and we may not easily persuade others into behaving in ways that create this culture. However, we can resolve to be more honest and respectful when communicating with coworkers, and since we are only focusing on our own behaviors, this is something that we can control. Who knows? This might even lead to a healthier workplace culture.
New Year’s resolutions are difficult to accomplish; hence, these resolutions have to be sustainable. To do so, they need to be personally meaningful to us. For many of us who have tried, sticking with our New Year’s resolutions are not always pleasant. In fact, they could be the opposite–they could be grueling tasks that test the limits of our self-control and willpower every single day. Therefore, our resolutions should give us a sense of purpose and a sense of growth. These should align with what we want to be, and not just with what others want us to be. For our resolutions to be sustainable, we also need to have the resources to achieve them. For instance, it would be impossible and incredibly frustrating to resolve to explore the world more if we do not have the resources to travel.
However, the impact of our resolutions may go beyond ourselves. While we focus on ourselves, it may be worthwhile to also think about how these commitments may affect the people around us. Resolutions that also improve the lives of others are ultimately better than resolutions that are only self-serving.
Of course, a minimum requirement for a New Year’s resolution is that it should be something that we want to do for ourselves. However, it is not something that we can only do by ourselves. Many of our resolutions are changes in habits, and these are usually incredibly hard to do. Enlisting the support of our immediate social circles, particularly those who are closest to us, may boost our chances of sticking with these goals. At the very least, we should be in environments that will not negate the efforts that we put in. For example, if you resolve to stop smoking this year, be with people who do not smoke, or at least, who do not smoke when you are around. Of course, it makes all the difference to have people cheer on us and pat us on the back as we make these changes.
A New Year’s resolution is more than just a promise to oneself; it is a way to have closure for the year that was. The exercise of creating these personal commitments allows us to look back and reflect on how we were in the year that was, and how we can improve ourselves in the year to come. More importantly, it is an articulation of hope for a better year and for a better self.
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Dr. Johnrev Guilaran is a professor of psychology at the University of the Philippines Visayas in Miagao, Iloilo.
