My parents broke the curse

Growing up, I always thought I lived a fairly average life. I assumed every child my age had the same opportunities and family dynamics that my siblings and I had. I thought it was normal to go to a private Catholic school, receive new uniforms, bags, and notebooks every school year, and have weekends or summers filled with voice or swimming lessons.

I knew we weren’t struggling, but we weren’t exactly spoiled either. I had to study hard and earn honors before I could get any kind of “reward.” Still, I didn’t realize I was living in a bubble.

Sure, I was aware that some kids lived more lavish lives than my brother and I did. But it never crossed my mind that others were struggling just to make ends meet.

After all, I was young.

I believed every parent was responsible enough to send their children to school. Little did I know how far from the truth that was.

It wasn’t until my first semester at the University of the Philippines that I realized how different my life had been compared to those around me. My classmates came from all walks of life—public schools, science high schools, even more prestigious private schools. And beyond academics, I was struck by how diverse their family situations were. Some had parents working abroad as OFWs, others came from broken families, and many were holding tightly to scholarships just to stay in school.

To say it was an eye-opener would be an understatement. I hadn’t realized how sheltered I had been. But my parents had always acted with the best intentions. I just never truly appreciated how lucky I was to have the resources and stability I thought everyone else also had.

Looking back, I can’t help but feel humbled by how narrow my perspective used to be. But that was the environment I was raised in. Most people around me had similar experiences, and it wasn’t until I stepped out of that comfort zone that I began to see how different life could be.

And that wasn’t the end of my awakening.

When I started working as a health-care professional at a private institution in Metro Manila, I saw another layer of reality. My colleagues and I earned roughly the same amount, but how we used our income varied dramatically. While I only had to think about myself, many of them budgeted their salaries to send money home, support siblings or relatives, and still cover rent and daily expenses in the city.

I was moved.

Since I started working, I’ve never been obliged to give a portion of my income to my parents. I’ve had the freedom to save, travel, and buy things for myself. All because my parents broke the curse—the expectation of paying them back.

Neither of my parents came from wealthy families. My mom is the daughter of a carpenter-turned-OFW and a housewife. My dad was raised by a bank teller-turned-housewife and a jeepney driver-turned-OFW.

And yet, they worked hard to give us a different life.

Thanks to them, I’ve had the luxury of choosing my own path—switching courses to pursue what I truly love, planning for my future, and living with fewer financial burdens. These are privileges I don’t take for granted.

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Of course, I still treat them now and then—buy them food or gifts when I can. But even when I try to give them a portion of my salary, my dad just tells me to save it instead.

Now, I understand how rare and valuable that is. And as much as I enjoy what I have, all the credit goes to my mom and dad. They broke the cycle. Even today, they don’t see me or my siblings as their retirement plans. They continue to save and invest so that they can support themselves when the time comes.

I understand why they’ve worked so hard to get here. As the eldest children in their families, both my parents know the burden of having to support relatives—even when they already had families of their own. They know what it’s like to have strained relationships because of money. And they made sure that my siblings and I would never have to go through that.

These are the realizations I’ve come to as I’ve met people with all kinds of life stories. I know words may never be enough to truly thank my parents for everything, but I hope to honor them by paying their generosity forward—by giving to others whenever I have the opportunity.

I grew up with comfort and stability. And now, as I continue to chase my goals and build the life I want, I do so freely—because my parents gave me the gift of choice, and the space to become whoever I want to be.