Rizal, jilted suitor
Growing up, I was taught that Jose Rizal was irresistible to women. In time, I learned the names of Segunda Katigbak, Leonor Rivera, O-sei (or Usui Seiko), and Josephine Bracken. I believed Rizal to be a heartthrob in his day, that is, until I came across his correspondence and diaries. Going back to these primary sources to write yet another column for Valentine’s, we learned about Nellie Boustead, a mestiza who lived in France, who jilted our national hero.
On Feb. 4, 1891, Mariano Ponce informed Rizal about Marcelo H. del Pilar’s election in the Filipino community, and his wish that Rizal submit an article for publication in the reformist newspaper “La Solidaridad.” He added that everyone in Madrid misses Rizal and is curious about the sequel to ”Noli Me Tangere.” Del Pilar added a short postscript to Ponce’s letter in Tagalog that reads:
“Sa paghuhugpong sa Noli at baka mapalitan ang O ng E. Pagkaingatan mo sanang huag magkagayon, o magkagayon na nga sana. Ibati mo ako sa kanilang mag i-ina, lalong-lalo na sa E ng Noli.” (In the continuation of the Noli, maybe the O might be changed into an E. Be very careful that this does not happen, or maybe it should happen. Please greet mother and daughters for me, especially the E in the Noli.) This is a private joke that Del Pilar signed with his nickname “Selong.” I missed this postscript before and only realized that when you change the O in Noli to an E, it will become “NELI,” a clear reference to Nellie Boustead. There is so much teasing going around in the correspondence. Valentin Ventura, in a letter from April 1890, congratulated Rizal for being stood up or jilted by an unnamed “chiquita,” as this would save him a lot of money and time. One has to reread Rizal’s correspondence closely to catch things that are implied but not stated.
It is said that when Rizal went on group dates with the pretty Boustead sisters, it was Adelina, the younger sister, whom he was interested in. Tomas Arejola did a background check on Adelina and found out she was “highly commendable for her very thorough education, her very beautiful moral and physical qualities … in addition, she is a Filipina.” Arejola offered unsolicited advice since Rizal was “free from your engagement in the Philippines.” He said, “See if Miss Boustead suits you. Court here, and marry here, and we are all here to applaud.” He advised Rizal against returning to the Philippines and marrying Leonor or anyone else in the Philippines because he was afraid that “instead of happiness [Rizal] would find only bitterness and trouble.”
With Rizal courting Adelina, that left Nellie open to the advances of Antonio Luna. When Luna was jilted by Nellie, he took to drink. While drunk, he insulted and challenged Rizal to a duel.
From Madrid, Luna wrote Rizal a rambling letter on Oct. 9, 1889, saying he had no grudge against Rizal and that there should be no grudge between them:
“You thought I was cold toward you, and I thought you were toward me. It was the result of a lack of understanding and of not speaking clearly … We have no reason to be somewhat cold to each other, for many times I asked if you were in love with Nelly and you told me no, and you even encouraged me to court her, saying that you have commitments to fulfill, etc. etc. Consequently, I was already sure of you, that you were my friend, the rest did not matter to me. This is all therefore, chico, we ought to continue as friends, as I thought we never ceased to be.” [In translating the above letter from the original Spanish, I could not be too literal about “si hacias el amor a Nelly” and toned it down, because “I asked if you were making love to Nelly” would read differently today than it did a century ago.]
A week later, Luna asked Rizal: “I wish you would give me some news about Nelly. Your friend and compatriot asks you, ”Does she still love me?” Since Nov. 16 [1889], I have not heard from her, although I wrote her a letter some 20 days ago. Though it is secondary, please write me plainly. I should like to know if I am making myself ridiculous by candidly believing in a love that no longer exists. This is really ridiculous. I would not want this after what occurred with her mother, to whom I was exceedingly attentive.” The details of what happened between Luna and the Bousteads are not clear. All we see from the correspondence is that Luna was very apologetic and even asked common friends to apologize on his behalf. I presume all this happened when Luna was under the influence of too much alcohol.
Rizal did not fare very well either. Nellie [aka Nelly or Helen] broke off with Rizal. She was Protestant and would not convert for the Roman Catholic Rizal. Second, Nellie’s mother liked Rizal, but didn’t think him capable of providing her with the lifestyle she was accustomed to. What would have happened if the duel had pushed through? We could have lost one or even both of our future national heroes, and Philippine history would not be as we know it today. And all that because of a woman named Nellie Boustead.
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