Sprinkle kindness

Vacation. “Ma’am, you can use the alcohol at the back of the chair.“ The steward respectfully gave the go signal to make use of it. My mom had decided at the last minute to use the restroom before deplaning. Appreciating his show of concern, my sister and I were assisting her when a lady, most likely the purser and head of the team, as the steward called her Ma’am, walked in our direction with an irate look on her face and sternly asked me if my mom could walk. Obviously, she was hurrying us along. Determined to keep things from getting out of proportion, we proceeded to walk calmly out of the plane. I looked around to see if we had caused any delay. The crew was still in the process of tidying up, and the pilot was still seated. A stewardess who must have witnessed what had transpired assured me that we hadn’t. To avoid ruining the start of a family vacation, I refrained from lodging a complaint with the customer care of our national flag carrier.

This was the first time it had ever happened in our travels. My sister was more forgiving and reminded me that the woman must probably be having a “bad hair day” and we should let it pass. I said that it may be so, but there is no excuse for rude behavior, especially when you choose to be employed in the business of providing service. But she is right—no one has full control of their emotions, and this was an opportunity to dig into our treasure chest for patience and understanding. After that needed pause, the initial displeasure quickly dissipated. Throughout the trip, as a family, we were all recipients of acts of kindness. Strangers would offer to lift my mom’s wheelchair, extend a helping hand to go through rough patches on the road, and even assist her through several flights of escalators. Upon reflection, what happened at that moment and the days that followed will always serve as an enduring lesson on the importance of being kind.

Green Mango. “Iha, may mangga ako sa bag, ibibigay ko sa iyo.” This encounter was close to three decades ago, but will always be a treasured memory. I happened to be next to an elderly lady traveling alone. We were at the check-in counter at the airport, and she was struggling to fill out her travel form. Upon inquiry, she told me that she had forgotten her reading glasses. Taking matters into my own hands, we accomplished it together. From then on, I became her unofficial and temporary companion. Even though she could still walk, our speed was definitely hampered to the extent that our names were called as the last passengers for the flight to Jakarta. Worried that we would be left behind, we increased our pace and made it just in time.

Exhausted but laughing from relief, we settled down in our designated seats. After I secured a blanket for her, she dug into her bag, took out a green mango, and offered it to me. Surprised and grateful, I politely declined. She shared that she was close to 80 (which made me feel guilty, as I had pushed her to walk faster), and that her daughter and son-in-law were going to pick her up at the airport. They met us at the gate, and we breezed through immigration. My sister, who was an expatriate then, listened to what had happened and agreed that the trip was more than blessed. A random act of kindness was swiftly reciprocated.

Bahay Kalinga. “Remember that time when we were offering to pitch in to raise P75,000 on our own after some officers of the board vetoed our suggestion and said that it was not aligned with the objectives of the program?” Tatang, as we fondly call him, and I were reminiscing. Our proposal was for the hospital consortium to help finance a home for a disadvantaged community in Mandaluyong as part of the Bahay Kalinga initiative. After an initial rejection, the board eventually agreed. Visiting the place years later, we saw that more houses had been built and the community was thriving. Imagine how we felt when the owners of the house we helped build excitedly rushed out to meet us. With tears in their eyes, they profusely thanked us for giving them the opportunity for a brighter start in life. Overwhelmed and all choked up, we could only offer our smiles and grip their hands tightly.

What does it take to be kind? Is it difficult? Does it come with a cost? Why are we surprised when people reciprocate? How many times have you been a recipient or a giver?

A priest once said that all of us, without exception, are capable of helping out, even if we sometimes think otherwise.